“You can either practice being right or practice being kind.”
Myths - Conflict means the relationship has gone bad, it hurts the relationship, and it reveals us as we do not want to be seen.
Content v. Relation dimensions of conflict
On what level is the conflict talking place? In most mature relationships conflict exists primarily on the content level symptomatic of deeper relationship dysfunctions.
Conflict Management
Avoidance v. Fighting Actively
Force v. Talk
Gunnysacking v. Present Focus
Attack v. Acceptance
personal rejection
beltlining
Verbal Aggressiveness v. Argumentativeness
· be objective
· avoid attacking
· reaffirm opponent’s competence
· avoid interrupting
· stress equality and similarities
· express interest in opposing view
· avoid emotion
· never humiliate
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